man you okay? Like, are you dead or what?” but there was no answer.
The pig was out. He moved in closer and pressed two fingers to his
neck. Still alive. Breathing normally. Milo figured that he looked all
right, that he had just banged his head pretty bad. Taking off his
bandana, he created a makeshift bandage by wrapping it tightly
around the officer’s head. It was so tight that the cop now looked as
if he were smiling.
“There you go homey. See, you ain’t so bad off after all. You
actually look kind of happy. So what do you think, you’ll be all right
here by yourself?”
Milo hadn’t expected an answer, of course. But almost in reply,
his police radio began to squawk. “Hey Doug, I think I lost you. We
seem to have broken our connection. Are you all right? I repeat: car
forty-three, are you all right? Answer me, car forty-three.”
Shit,
thought Milo, and began to panic. Impulsively, he reached
out for the handset. His mind reeled with adrenaline. “Uh, yeah,” he
said, disguising his voice, doing his best to sound like a white cop,
“Let me get back to you on that. I gotta go take a dump.”
A chuckle came from the radio. “Roger. You gotta cut down on
those bran muffins. Out.” A squawk signified that the transmission
was over.
Good thinking, man,
thought Milo.
Now scram.
“So, was there anyone in the car?” asked Harvey, by now quite
inebriated.
“Car? Oh, no there’s no one in the car. Let’s get out of here, man.”
Milo gunned the engine and pulled away from the scene. Good, he
thought, the Monza was driving fine, so the damage must’ve only
been cosmetic. His cousin could steal a new door and side panels
from another Monza in the neighborhood.
“What’s with the firearm?” said Harvey.
“Firearm?”
“The gun that happens to be protruding from your trousers. And
don’t use any tired old lines about just being glad to see me, either.
As your passenger, and sponsor of your fuel, I demand an
explanation!”
Damn, this guy’s a hardass,
thought Milo. But he was paying for
the gas, which was why he was taking a roundabout route. “Oh,
this,
”
he said. “No, man, this is my cigarette lighter.”
“Yes? Let me see it then. I would love to examine such an
H O L Y S H I T !
60
 |
 |
 |
 |