O l i v e r B e n j a m i n
situation for a hero. With no one around to rescue, his very identity
seemed to melt away from him. Continually, he had to remind
himself that somewhere, very far away from where he was now, an
entire race of souls were dependent on him for their salvation. Still,
he didn’t see how meandering about in the middle of nowhere could
be of any service to anyone. He was finding it very difficult to be
dynamic.
A weak cry of distress snapped him to attention. “Cluck cluck
cluck!” it said.
Cluck cluck cluck!
might as well have been his middle name.
He raced over to the source of the cry and found a turkey laying
on its side, a broken arrow stuck in its breast.
“Fear not brave fowl!” Muchoman cried, “I will rescue you from
your torment!” He leaned over and carefully yanked the sharp point
from the turkey’s quivering body. Finding the animal too weak to
walk, he picked it up and patted its head.
“I have saved the noble turkey!” Muchoman cried up to the skies,
hoping to attract the attention of the judges. “You may call me home
now! I have succeeded in my mission!”
The turkey, frightened by his booming voice, pecked him
violently in the chest. Startled, Muchoman dropped the animal to the
ground.
“Oops!” the hero cried. Bending down to apologize to the bird, he
saw that it was dead.
Shaken, he stood back up with the turkey in his arms. “It was an
accident!” he protested.
There was no reply.
Muchoman decided that he would eat the turkey. At least it
would satiate his hunger and possibly eliminate any evidence of his
mishap.
Recalling the rigorous Boy Scout training that had helped shape
him into the hero he was today, he made a small fire and began to
roast the bird. The tragedy of the day, along with all his wandering
had left him exhausted, though, and he fell asleep.
When he awoke, the fire was a raging inferno.
“Aaaaghh!” he cried, the leg of his new Muchosuit engulfed by
fire. Luckily the gods had fashioned him a replacement Muchosuit, or
he would have been injured. He hopped about frantically in search of
something to extinguish the flames. That was when he noticed the
savage, warlike clan approaching from a distance.
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